As you may know, October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, and I thought it would be fitting to dedicate my first weekly posting of “She Speaks!” to this cause.
First, let me say that my heart goes out to Jennifer Hudson as she mourns the loss of her mother and brother who were murdered in her mother’s South Chicago home on Friday. I saw in one news story that this may be the result of a domestic dispute. Unfortunately, too many domestic disputes end in the tragic deaths of innocent victims.
In my own life, I’ve also experienced domestic violence from different perspectives. When I was seventeen, I met a handsome young man who I eventually discovered turned violent when he became jealous. After getting hit in the head on more than one occasion, I walked away from the situation and refused to see him ever again. I never imagined that I’d be confronted with this kind of violence again, but in my twenties I became involved with yet another man who would use violence to try to control my life. This time, it wasn’t as easy to walk away from the situation because I’d had a child with him. For years, I lived in fear of being hurt or even killed. I thank God that He protected me from harm and showed me what real love is. On the other hand, not everyone is able to escape this sickness as easily. I continue to pray for a family member who has been the victim of domestic violence for over 15 years now. It’s as though she doesn’t think she deserves anything better; like this is what her life should be like. What about her innocent children? Should they be made to suffer as well?
Domestic violence doesn’t just affect the victim. It reaches far and wide and there are indirect victims who suffer as well. For instance, the children of the victim suffer as they watch their parent or guardian abused and demeaned at the hands of their perpetrator. And there are family members who are helpless as they watch their child, sister, or brother constantly in danger, not knowing when or if the phone will ring or if a knock will come at the door bringing bad news.
Domestic violence is more common than some of us may be aware. Around the world, at least one in every three women has been beaten, coerced into sex or otherwise abused during her lifetime. Nearly one-third of American women (31 percent) report being physically or sexually abused by a husband or boyfriend at some point in their lives, according to a 1998 Commonwealth Fund survey.
If you or someone you know is a victim of domestic violence and would like to get help, here are a couple of resources where you can start:
http://www.endabuse.org/
http://www.ncadv.org/ or call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).
Have you or someone you know ever been the victim of domestic violence?
What affect did it have on your life or the life of your family and/or friends?
How did you become free from the situation?
“She speaks!” I listen…
